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30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge
- Nancy Leigh DeMoss
- Thu, Mar 18, 2010
Proverbs 31:12 says the virtuous wife does her husband "good, and not harm, all the days of her life." Certainly one way to do this is through words of encouragement.
Over the years, I've often issued the 30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge to wives. Here's how it works:
1. For the next 30 days, commit to say nothing negative about your husband—not to him, and not to anyone else about him.
2. Every day for the next 30 days, tell your husband something that you appreciate about him; then tell someone else about it.
The countless responses we've received from women who have taken this challenge illustrate the power of affirmation and encouragement:
- We've been married for 43 years, and our marriage was dormant. I didn't think anything could revive it. I was wrong. This challenge has made a huge improvement in our relationship.
- This hasn't been easy going for me. There's a lot of hurt and anger and resentment toward my husband to overcome. But you have encouraged me to remember why I fell in love with this guy, what was so special about him. You've given me hope for my marriage. I may not be able to change my husband, but I can change my heart and my attitude toward him with God's help. My husband is talking to me more—really talking from his heart. We still have a long way to go, but it is working. Every day gets a little easier, and some of that anger and resentment is fading away. I married a great man. I have just forgotten to nurture him in the day-to-day busyness of our lives. I love my husband.
- I am realizing that by me being so negative, I was the main source of the tension and stress in the house. Now that I am encouraging and expressing love, my husband has expressed, verbally and by his actions, how in love with me he is. Thank you for creating this challenge. It is a struggle sometimes, but worth the fight.
- I never thought in a million years that such simple words could have such a profound effect on our relationship.
- I began the 30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and within two weeks, my husband was making comments such as "Something's changed." "You're more interested in me." "Something's gotten into you." "You never told me that." "Thank you for saying all those nice things." I have had a true change of heart toward my husband. He feels it, sees it, and loves it.
- At first, the thought of saying only positive things about my husband made my skin crawl! I thought, how sad for me to feel more comfortable bashing my husband to people than lifting him up. About halfway through, my husband said to me, "I have really fallen in love with you. I mean, I loved you before, but I really love you now!" I was blown away!
- Everyone who is married should read this challenge and live by it—not just for 30 days, but every day. The rewards are endless.
What will your story be? The 30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge will change you as you see your husband through grateful eyes. It may even change your husband as you water the soil of his heart with words of affirmation, appreciation, and admiration.
Adapted from Nancy's radio broadcast on October 22, 2008. Ready to take the challenge? Click here and sign up to receive a daily e-mail reminder for 30 days, each highlighting a practical way to encourage your husband.