The longest kiss on record lasted for 30 hours, 59 minutes, and 26 seconds!

A kiss like that doesn't "just happen." The young couple that executed it undoubtedly had a plan and a remarkable level of commitment. In contrast, their first kiss was most likely driven by spontaneity and passion. But this award-winning kiss required purpose and resolve.

The same can be said of every successful marriage.

 

It takes more than human passion to finish victoriously. What often begins as a "red hot" attraction ultimately requires an understanding of God's purposes and plan - and plenty of personal sacrifice.

A closer look reveals that the first-ever marriage did not originate with the passion of a man and a woman, but with the passion and purposes of God. The Scriptures make it clear that God's heart was very pleased when he created man (Gen. 1:31). And after placing him in the midst of a choice between good and evil, God declared it was "not good" for man to be alone (Gen. 2:15-18). Thus, he fashioned woman to be a suitable helper for him. Together, as one flesh, they stood a stronger chance to resist evil and to fulfill one of God's primary purposes for marriage . . . to reflect Him (Gen. 1:26).

I believe that God's heart was pleased again when He watched Adam's elated response as he looked into the eyes of the one designed to be his completer. But not only was God's heart stirred. So was Satan's. The Scriptures teach us that soon after the creation of Eve, Satan began his efforts to destroy the union God had just created (Gen. 3:1).

Why did Satan act so quickly to attack the first marriage? Because he knew that unity in marriage was a critical part of God's plan to redeem mankind. If he could create division in marriage, then it would distort man's view of God and threaten man's willing acceptance of God's love and redemption. Satan must have reasoned, "If I can destroy marriages . . . I succeed. If marriage succeeds . . . I fail." It is that simple. And it's that serious.

Satan's chief weapon against marriage is sin. All sin divides because it is rooted in four ancient toxins to meaningful relationships. Selfishness. Discontentment. Pride. Blame. Four marriage killers. Four divorce fuelers. When it comes to the oneness that God intends for the marriage relationship, sin is lethal.

Satan's strategy may have been simple, but it has proven to be incredibly effective. Two marriages collapse every minute in our nation. And tragically, more than half claim to be Christians. Despite the foundation of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and the popularity of a dizzying array of marriage seminars and books, millions of Christian marriages continue to crumble.

And as Christian marriages disintegrate, so too does the reputation of God in our nation. After all, what can be more fundamental than the relationship of a husband and a wife? If there is no power to keep covenant at home, the credibility of the gospel is grievously harmed. That's why I believe with the prophet Malachi that the activity of God in nationwide revival is inseparable from a corresponding revival of covenant-keeping in marriage.

I will never forget one of the most miserable days of my life. Several million dollars had been donated to help Life Action construct a beautiful new office. The plans had been drawn. Groundbreaking was now an exciting memory. The foundation was complete. The entire structure was erected. The brick exterior was first class. The inside walls were even finished. But when the day arrived for the elevator to be installed, a worker discovered something was dreadfully wrong.

The main weight-bearing walls were no longer vertically correct. The defect stretched from one end of the building to the other.

Construction immediately halted. Almost unbelievably, I was told the building was unsafe and uninhabitable. The leaning walls simply could not bear up under the load of gravity, use, and time.

I was devastated. What about the huge investment of money, time, and emotion by so many? After considerable analysis, an architect suggested a solution - anchoring the exterior walls into the ground with giant bolts used on city skyscrapers. Once in place, the building would actually be more secure than originally designed.

I learned an invaluable lesson that day: Life in a sinful world will pull down anything that leans. Being vertically correct is absolutely essential. And nowhere is that principle truer than in marriage.

Over the years, I have observed a disturbing pattern. Underneath many seemingly successful marriages, there are often weight-bearing walls that begin to lean. Everything looks great from the outside, but without re-anchoring, disaster looms.

I am writing this editorial two days after my 33rd wedding anniversary. The passing years have convinced me that only to the degree to which I am right in my relationship with God vertically can my horizontal relationship with Sue be right as well. That's why I am a firm believer that the first step toward a revived marriage is a revived relationship with the Lord.

Ponder with me the "connection" between the vertical and the horizontal in the following testimonies from restored marriages from recent Life Action local church summits:

• Our love, joy, and appreciation for the Lord have been restored. I don't think my family will ever be the same.
• I was very angry at God. Through your teachings my heart has changed. I look at my husband and my children through new eyes. It is no longer a burden to care for them. I see it as a privilege and an honor. There is such a joy and a peace in our home now.
• When you came my marriage was at the worst point it had ever been! It seemed that every time my wife and I spoke, we'd get into a fight. I was full of anger and did not understand why. We were both crying out to God for help, but it seemed He was not answering. I started coming to each service and, slowly, God began to speak to me again. Now I'm listening and obeying what I hear. I'm walking with Jesus again and my wife is also. Praise God!
• I have been able to release bitterness, confess my pride, and thank God for who He made me. Through this, I am closer to my husband.

These precious couples discovered the secret of a restored marriage - they discovered that they needed God.

This special edition of Spirit of Revival is dedicated to reviving marriages by helping couples deal with root causes rather than symptoms. The place to begin is with the weight-bearing wall of our lives - our relationship with God. And while anchoring our marriages to the rock of God Himself may mean dealing honestly with the core issues of our hearts, the incredible hope of a revived relationship with God is transformed relationships.

Right now, before you read any further, would you take a moment to quiet your heart before the Lord? Would you simply pray, "Lord, show me my need for you. Do whatever is necessary to make me a channel of your love toward my spouse. Lord, speak to my heart as I read and ponder your truth."

May God revive our hearts and homes for His glory!